The Betty Crocker Project : The Cream Cheese Brownie Pie

I keep starting and deleting blog posts on the following topics:

• Why I'm happy Dan isn't a vampire. Vampire/human romantic relationships always seem so dramatic and dysfunctional.
• How robots are cool because they're vegan, but how a misplaced affection for them may someday lead to our destruction in a robo-apocalypse.
• What superheroes I suspect would go vegan if there were a way to get these brownies into the Marvel Universe; but Dan already wrote something like that like a billion years ago.
• How every vegan has their own favorite brownie recipe that they think is the second coming, and how they're all pretty good in different ways. In fact, I can't remember the last time I had a bad vegan brownie.
• Why I think my cats are Russian Spies.

But none of them ever really come together. I mean, in theory they made me giggle--and I am sincerely glad Dan isn't a vampire--but I think instead I'll stick to the subject. These brownies are pretty good if you like a dark chocolatey fudgey chewy brownie, but if you have your own favorite vegan brownie you can always substitute it, because the real star of this recipe is the cream cheesecake layer. I drizzled some of the caramel sauce from the Caramel Sticky Rolls over them, because that's how we roll around here. Of course, I've heard from some of you that you prefer the caramel sauce on the Turtle Cheesecake... so follow your heart. I won't judge.

OK - let's do this.

The Betty Crocker Project : Quesadillas

Sometimes we come across one of the Betty recipes that makes us ask ourselves, "Does this really need a recipe?" The thing is, we don't make the rules, and if Betty says this is a recipe, well, it is. Also, some people are beginners... So if this is helpful for you, that's good enough for me! This was a delicious dinner. Next time I think I'll add some fake chicken, or maybe some artichoke hearts, or both. Who knows how crazy our quesadillas might get? Broccoli could be good.

Last night, Dan and his family went to a baseball game to eat veggie dogs and cheer for the doomed Norfolk Tides. I was left home alone to work on my writing a bit and some upcoming projects for Meet The Shannons. I may have also watched a few episodes of Ghost Adventures - which in my opinion is one of the most hilarious shows on TV. If you aren't familiar - here's a rundown:

Three dudes go to famous historical locations with night-vision goggles and cameras, and taunt ghosts like they're picking a fight at Hooters. There are a lot of Affliction and System of a Down t-shirts, and yelling of "Brutal" and "Bro". On one occasion, I think of they were shooting at ghosts with cap guns, which my friend Anjali over at Delicious Coma has pointed out "is messed up for so many reasons." Last night they had a machete. Seriously.

The quesadillas were super fast, so I wouldn't miss a minute of awesome-ness--which made them awesome too!

The Betty Crocker Project : Thai Chicken with Basil & Lemonade

This weekend we had a Shannon invasion!

Dan's parents and little sister came down from Boston and NYC to hang out at the beach, watch some soccer, and celebrate his dad's birthday/retirement/belated Father's Day--a perfect-storm celebration with the Virginia Shannons.

Yes, the US team is out of the World Cup, and that was a bummer. But you have to admit Ghana's keeper is talented. I mean, it would be really hard to think of another man dressed in head-to-toe periwinkle who kicks that much ass.

Saturday in Virginia was hot. Not really living on the Sun hot; more like Mercury, or that binary star they thought was a moon around Mercury until the 70s. So I thought it would be a good idea to skip the oven. We pulled out the rice cooker and scanned the "20 minutes or less" section of Betty's Big Red for something kinda light and healthy. The thing I didn't expect was the steam from the wok.

Yeah, I kinda cooked myself making this, but it was so worth it! We paired it with Betty's Lemonade recipe and it had a lovely dinner with some loved ones... after I drank about 4 glasses of icy lemonade. Sigh - what a world.

Special Edition : Jambalaya and a tribute to Cafe Bamboo

We recently heard some sad news.

Dan and I went to New Orleans for our honeymoon last summer. It was pretty hot, Dan caught a cold, and we saw alligators. Basically, we had an amazing time in one of the most charming cities in the country! The best part of the trip was being pleasantly surprised by all the delicious vegan Creole, Cajun, Soul and just plain ol' Southern food. I mean, we enjoyed Po'Boys, Key Lime Pie, Gumbo, Sweet Potato Fries, Cajun-Spiced Veggie Burgers, and Fried "Chicken". One of the best spots was called Cafe Bamboo.

I've eaten at vegan restaurants all over the world, and Cafe Bamboo was easily my top 10 favorite spots. That's why it broke my heart to hear they're closing their doors, and that there are people who won't get to experience their awe-inspiring take on vegan Cajun, Creole and Soul food. We're dedicating this Jambalaya to those folks at Cafe Bamboo.

Good luck to you guys, and I hope to hear you'll open your doors again someday!

The Betty Crocker Project : New Style Pork Chops

For weeks, I've been talking about making vegan New Style Pork Chops. I tried to research why they're called that, and spent a lot of time looking into what would be the best mock meat to use. I wrote a blog post in my head about this time a few years back when Dan and I were both in New York for work, and I took him to the Algonquin Hotel for dinner. Now if you aren't big history nerds like us, you might not know that the dinning room in that hotel is famous for hosting The Algonquin Round Table in the 1920s.

It was pretty cool to sit in The Rose Room, inches from the table where Dorthy Parker, Robert Benchley, George S. Kaufman, Harold Ross, Tallulah Bankhead, Harpo Marx, and numerous other authors, intellectuals, and various other talents met daily for lunch, conversation and harassment of the waitstaff. What wasn't cool was the menu that left us eating a dinner of roasted vegetable sides and some dry bow tie pasta. We weren't actually there for the food, and now we can say we had gin & tonics at The Algonquin. But in a dream world, a dish made just like this would have been on the menu, and just because it isn't actually called "New York Style Pork Chops" doesn't make that any less true.

I think we've taken this dish to a new level of "New Style" by making it vegan. This is a classy dish that would be perfect for any special occasion, but can also doll up a boring Wednesday.

New Style Pork Chops

• 1 Cup of Match Vegan Meats Pork (Separate it into "chops", each about 1/4 to 1/2 a cup. Form the "pork" with your hands into patties smaller than your hand. There are several May Wah products you could also use, and of course you can always make this with your favorite Fake Chicken. I guess that would make it New Style Chicken, but still pretty tasty!)
• 1 Cup of Better than Bouillon vegetable broth (prepared using instructions on the jar)
• 1 Tablespoon Lemon Juice
• 1 Teaspoon Agave Nectar
• 1/4 Cup White Wine
• 1 Tablespoon Braggs
• 1/4 Teaspoon Black Pepper
• 3 Tablespoon Olive Oil
• 1/2 Cup Red Onion (chopped)
• 2 Cloves Garlic ( minced)
• 1/2 Cup Kalamata Olives
• 1 Tablespoon Fresh Thyme Leaves
• 1 Tablespoon Fresh Parsley (chopped)
• Rice Pilaf to serve with the Chops

Make Rice Pilaf per instructions on the box/bag. We used a Wild Rice Mix from Trader Joe's, but there are a lot to choose from.

In a shallow bowl, mix Broth, Lemon Juice, Braggs and Agave Nectar. Dip your Chops into the Broth Mix and count to 20. Place the dipped Chops onto a dish and set them aside.

In your handy cast iron skillet, heat Olive Oil at a medium heat. Place your Chops in the heated Oil and brown on both sides. Once you start to have a crispy "skin" on your Chops, pour the rest of the Broth Mix over the Chop and add Red Onions, Garlic, Black Pepper, and White Wine. Continue to flip the Chops and mix the other ingredients. Let the Chops simmer for around 15 minutes, or until the Onions are tender. Toss in the Kalamta Olives, Thyme and Parsley. Let simmer another 5 minutes.

Serve over Rice Pilaf with a lovely cocktail and some witty remarks.